Developing character, in myself and my children, has been on my mind the past few months.
- As I prepare for this coming school year, I want to put character training high on the list in terms of priorities.
- My lack of character (moral or ethical strength, self-discipline) in parts of my life are keeping me from being a good steward of my talents.
- My lack of character negatively affects others. (see footnote)
- There are parenting issues arising that require lots of character on my part.
Today I was rereading Michael Pearl's article, Jumped Ship, part 5 in a series on why some children walk away from their parents and their teaching. This paragraph smacked me on the head:
"You must become what you want your child to become if you would bring him to repentance. You must become a person of joy, peace, and love. You must know God and love him. You must be disciplined and holy in your own personal life. You must tend to your marriage so that it becomes the envy of all who know you well."
Do I require things of my children that I'm not doing? That doesn't mean I stop training them until I am flawless. It does mean that I need to be addressing my character issues with more tenacity - take the log out of my own eye, so to speak. Instead of looking at my current challenges as focusing so much thought on how to correct my children, I need to first consider how to train myself to respond to my children.
Update: Tonight while I was skimming
Parenting Today's Adolescent by Dennis & Barbara Rainey of
Family Lif Today, I ran across this tidbit that fit so well w/this post:
"...the emphasis (of the book) on helping parents develop their own convictions on issues before attempting to shape the convictions of their children. It is impossible to make the old "do as I say, not as I do" routine work with today's young people. They just won't buy it-and shouldn't." (p. XIV)
There's hope! I'm so thankful for books, magazine, and web resources that enable me to learn from others' experiences.
*Funny thing happened while writing this post - my lack of character showed up. I had to take the shirts from LAST July's production up to church because I had not done so yet. Granted, they are washed and in a nice new container - but they are at my house instead of the church. Oy. As if that wasn't bad enough, one of my friends had to come pick up the shirts because dh & I haven't fished out my truck key that's been stuck in the truck seat for a few months. See how my weak character can affect others? Double oy.
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